Movie Review: Vampire Academy

Vampire Academy Movie

IMDB:

Rose Hathaway is a Dhampir, half human/vampire, guardians of the Moroi, peaceful, mortal vampires living discretely within our world. Her legacy is to protect the Moroi from bloodthirsty, immortal Vampires, the Strigoi. This is her story.

Director:

 Mark Waters

Writers:

Richelle Mead (novel), Daniel Waters (screenplay)

Trailer: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E1ERrnYunBg

Review:

As a reader of the Vampire Academy series by the fabulous Richelle Mead it is my duty to say that the movie is very different from the book.

There were uncountable situations where I just wished they had followed the book, if the books are famous and a lot of people loved them (me being one of those), then why the HELL don’t they just stick to the damn books?! I mean it’s not that hard! Just take a look at Harry Potter and Hunger Games!!! I felt pretty damn mad when something happened out-of-place. One thing is to choose a cast we don’t like, mainly because we just pictured a different person for that character, but hey, that’s just the way things are. I never complained about the cast, I was just happy a movie was being made and hoped the actors would perform well. Another thing is to change some things on the plot that shouldn’t have been changed… Some stuff were just pretty damn ridiculous, like Natalie LICKING A FUCKING WALL! #whatthehell?! or the headmistress Kirova acting like a total slut, it was bad enough that she looks way younger than expected but acting like a sex-hungry teenager? Just awkward.

And what about Queen Tatiana? What the actual fuck? If you have watched the movie then you know what I’m talking about.

Although there were a lot of parts on the movie where I found myself cringing and wishing for them to just read the books and stick to them, there were also a lot of positive aspects I have to mention:

The cast, especially Zoey Deutch, I loved her! She was just awesome, some people say she isn’t pretty enough to play Rose but that doesn’t matter! Actually, I think she is really beautiful. But how she looks isn’t what I wanted to talk about, I want to praise her acting, which was amazing, she acted just how I had pictured Rose, sassy, sexy, brave and a mix between feminine and warrior-like.

Lucy Fry also did a good job at playing Lissa!

Now, about the guys, me and my best friend were a squealing mess most of the time, that Jesse (Ashley Charles), Manson (Cameron Monaghan) and Christian (Dominic Sherwood) damnnn! Hotness everywhere, plain, total hotness!

No, I haven’t forgotten our Russian guy, Dimitri Belikov (Danila Kozlovsky), I have no words to express how I felt when he spoke, his hair looks stupid and wrong, but, I don’t know, that man can make any woman’s knees weak… That slight Russian accent and the way he said “Roza” — ohgodkillme — a girl can’t possibly act unaffected by him, that is simply not possible.

The soundtrack is pretty awesome, I’m currently listening to it on a youtube playlist, I love it, it’s pretty good. It has attitude and is sassy, just like Rose xD

Overall, I liked the movie, even though, I was mad they didn’t stick to the book but I was kind of already expecting that, so I wasn’t too disappointed. Yet, the cast is amazing and so is the movie, it was entertaining, funny, romantic and edgy, the kind of feeling I got from the books. As such, I am happy about it, and obviously, I hope a 2nd movie is filmed, I WANT ADRIAN IVASKOV IN THE BIG SCREEN!

4 Chibis

Movie Review: The Mortal Instruments – City of Bones

File:The Mortal Instruments - City of Bones Poster.jpg

The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones

Release Date: 21st August 2013

Review

I just got home from the theater. Really, it’s been like 3/4 hours since I’ve left the theater feeling disappointment and cursing the writers and producers behind the movie adaptation of City of Bones, the first book in the Mortal Instruments series by Cassandra Clare.

If you follow my Goodreads account or are a friend of mine you know that even though I didn’t love the first book, this series is one of my favourites and when I knew a movie was coming out based on it I just had to call all my friends and bore them about going with me to watch it and wondering what scenes would make it to the screen and how the actors would perform.

It’s with great sadness that I think I WON’T be watching the second movie, if there is one, in the future. City of Bones is a badly planned movie that won’t work out for neither the people who have read the book and for those who had never even heard that the books existed and just wanted to appreciate a new movie. In lesser words, it sucked. Big time.

For those who have read the book(s) I’ll explain what I found most lacking in the movie by the end of the review. That way, people who haven’t had the chance to read the series and want to won’t be spoiled unless they want to find out what they did ABSOLUTELY WRONG.

Basically, what they have done is “introduce” every character in the book right in the first scenes, and I say “introduce” because all we know is their first names and nothing else. There is no background story, nothing. For those who haven’t read the books it probably was just a movie with a bunch of characters that appear out of nowhere and get together to do something. A friend of mine didn’t even know all their names by the end of the movie.

What was a big shock for me and my friends was the whole info dump they just threw at us. I didn’t know info dump was possible in movies. Turns out it is. They just gave you the whole information in one go, the movie had no development but they wanted you to know EVERYTHING so just make a character say everything there is to know in one scene. AND THEY TELL THINGS FROM BOOK 2 AND 3.

Also, the CGI, auch. Just auch. Okay, it wasn’t that bad! The Worst CGI prize goes without a doubt to the movie adaptation of The Host by Stephanie Meyer. That was bad, guys, really bad, it’s, in my opinion, the worst movie I have ever seen. But that doesn’t matter now. The demons were alright and some of the effects even I have to admit were pretty cool. But the portals and the runes AND the runes effects were those you laugh at. There is a particular scene where Jace uses the steel to watch through some books in a shelf and I just couldn’t stop thinking, WTF?

Finally, the soundtrack. Who chose it?? Who was in charge of putting music in this movie? Really…

i will find you and i will talk to you. | I will find you and kill you

You’re lucky I’m a pacific person who is only aggressive to her friends. But be warned, it’s going to be a very serious talk. Come on, in a really intense scene (you know what scene I’m talking about, everyone knows! It’s in the freaking trailer when it shouldn’t be! It’s the kiss scene *smooch*) someone thought it would be cool to have an upbeat music. It would work IF and only IF the freaking music didn’t have any lyrics. And let’s not even talk about the choice of music, ugh, I wanted to scream the entire music every time a pop song that had nothing to do with the scenes came up. It was a lot of  the film time unfortunately.

Worst of all was how they just spoiled the whole series. GUYS THEY SPOILED THE SERIES AND RUINED THE WHOLE PLOT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE FREAKING MOVIE! I will just say it and get over with it. There is a scene where Hodge just says to Valentine to lie to Clary (TO LIE) and tell her and Jace they are brothers. THIS IS THE WHOLE MYSTERY BEHIND THE SERIES! We just find out in BOOK 3 that they ARE NOT actually brothers. So thank you, you just ruined the series for those who have read book 1 (Thank goodness I wasn’t one of those or I would just sue you for spoiling me the whole series if that was possible)

Anyway, NOW for those WHO HAVE READ the book, and will be enraged and will probably want to cry or just throw the popcorn all over the place…. Here are the things they changed, and believe me, they fucking changed a lot. It’s like they just read the book and said “Fuck it, let’s make a movie about another book that doesn’t exist” and that book is just boring and confusing as hell!

  • They change the order of some things and I know there must be changes whenever a book turns into a movie, some things just don’t work on screen and I fully recognize that. What I don’t understand is why they decided to put the scene where Simon tries to declare himself to Clary BEFORE they go to Pandemonium and meet Jace. Jace’s input on the book is hilarious on that scene and they completely ruined it taking him out of it. It just didn’t work.
  • Clary should kill the demon when it’s in her house right? GIRL POWER!! No… Let’s just make Jace save the day and kill it.
  • Idris? What is Idris?? IT DOESN’T FUCKING APPEAR ON THE MOVIE! It isn’t mentioned, like ever! It doesn’t exist, Shadowhunters don’t have their own country. THAT IS IMPORTANT AS HELL because if they DO want to make a second and third movie, they have to introduce Idris somehow.
  • Without Idris where are Isabelle and Alec’s parents and cute nerd little brother. Oh yeah, remember when I said they don’t tell anything about the characters that appear on the movie? Well, their parents and Max are never mentioned either! They must not exist! I don’t think the writer read the whole book, he must have just skimmed it. I don’t know, he should just be fired when he presented the script.
  • That hilarious scene where Simon turns into a mouse?? Yeah, another cut out. They just made him drink a potion that made him pass out and the vampires just took him. Just like that, no mouse, no jokes about him being a mouse. Oh! And no flying motorcycle either in Jace and Clary’s rescue plan.
  • Valentine running away with the cup? What, no!  Let’s just make Clary get the freaking cup back!
  • Silent Brothers, what are they? What do they do?? They live in the City of Bones. The End.

There were probably many other things that were changed but I don’t really remember. I just know that most of the time I looked at my friend and just made a crying face.

Now, they added some scenes that were actually pretty nice and worked really well, like the part where Clary’s mother is abducted. That was one of the best scenes, just because she was so badass! Ok, it’s the best scene…

And I won’t even talk about Magnus. It’s just not worth it.

Big disappointment and I won’t let myself be fooled like this again.

1 Chibi